he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
Randomize
