Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
Randomize
