He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
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