Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
I TAUGHT HER CAT TO SIT. CATS DON'T FUCKING SIT ON COMMAND. BUT THIS ONE DID!
It's basically my crowning achievement.
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
Randomize
