and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
Randomize
