who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
I just tipped a bartender in xanax.
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
Randomize
