Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize