When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
I am never drinking with the goths again.
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
Randomize