can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
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