i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Randomize
