U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
Randomize
