Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
Randomize
