Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
You blacked out and then went around stealing other peoples phones and leaving yourself voicemails
I got two from random numbers, the first was me and said "Don't forget you murdered Josh in Wii Bowling"
The second Jenn said "You are ridiculously smart for drunk dialing yourself"
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
Randomize
