New low: just hacked my moms facebook
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Randomize