no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
Randomize
