You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
Randomize