You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
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