I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
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