hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize