I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
Randomize
