haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize