erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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