Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
It's official drugs can't kill me
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
Randomize
