id be glad to
she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Randomize
