well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
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