And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
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