Kiss
Puke
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
It's shark week go big or go home
Randomize
