ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
Randomize
