so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
