i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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