Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
Randomize