SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
Randomize