I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
as a side note pls kill me
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
Randomize
