Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
how do flat chested girls get laid?
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
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