I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
the night ended with taco bell and tears
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
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