yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
Acid is not a monday night drug
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
Soon to be ex is nowhere to be found. Her attorney/new BF just showed up. 30 minutes late looking hungover. Pretty sure I'm getting the kids AND the house!
Randomize
