none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
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