YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
Randomize
