Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Randomize
