I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
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