Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
i came on her dog
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
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