Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Randomize