people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
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