escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
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