I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize
