i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
