I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
Randomize