YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
