You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
Randomize
