return my video game
STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Randomize
