question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
Randomize
